Archive for the ‘2.9’ Category

Cake Fail

Wednesday, July 10th, 2013

Oh 2.9. My least favorite second grade class. I’m pretty sure they know it too, as they’re the only class I’ve had to scold pretty much every class. When they’re awake, class is good, but I teach them first period and they’re just so tired. It also probably doesn’t help that they have the scariest most intense homeroom teacher, and I teach them on Tuesdays, otherwise known as death days.

Yesterday I taught them for the last time, and when I walked in they presented me with a cake. A cake. These students for the most part can’t be bothered to wake up when I enter the classroom. And they got me a cake.

 A. Cake.

I promised them that while we would continue the class as per usual, I’d make sure we had enough time to share and eat the cake. They insisted that because the cake was so small I should eat it all myself. I told them that I couldn’t possibly eat  a whole cake by myself at 9 am, and that they should help me. We decided that as the cake was too small for the entire class, I would decide how many slices we could cut the cake into, and then we would use a computer program that generated random numbers to fairly choose which students would receive a slice.

I decided on 8 slices because that seemed reasonable, and so they decided that we would choose seven student numbers. The seconds in-between calling each number were fraught with tension, as each student waited with baited breath, and the seven students whose names were called jumped out of their seats, more awake and energetic than I have ever seen them in my class.

After class, I asked a student to come up and cut the cake for me, as I have cake-cutting anxiety (true fact. I never cut my own cakes. ever.) This student for some reason divided the cake into six slices. The students then realized that they had cut the cake into six instead of eight slices, and so then played rock-paper-scissors to lower the number of cake eaters from the lucky seven to six. After a pretty intense game of rock-paper-scissors, the lucky six grabbed their slices of cake and shoved them into their own mouths and into mouths of friends, like a wedding gone hideously wrong.

Here’s the thing, though – they forgot to give me a slice of cake.

Coffee and Good Cheer

Monday, June 10th, 2013

Ugh 2.9. 2.9. It’s so frustrating teaching them because anything that works well with any other class flops. They’ve been getting better but even their “better” in my class isn’t great. I lectured the class as a whole, talked to some kids individually, and left class feeling really discouraged when I ran into one of my favorite second graders.

I asked how his day was and he responded “FANTASTIC” with a giant grin on his face, then asked me how I was. Something must have shown in my face, because when I answered “oh I’m fine” he could tell something was up.

“What’s wrong, teacher?”
“Oh nothing. I just want to sleep. Mornings are very difficult. I must go drink coffee.”
“I WILL BUY YOU COFFEE.”
“Oh no! You don’t have to buy me coffee.”
“Yes Teacher! I will buy you coffee! Wait a moment please!”

The student thrust his hand into his pockets and then realized that he was wearing his gym uniform, and then hurriedly explained that he could not buy me coffee because he didn’t have any money on him, but that he would buy me machine milk coffee during cleaning period. I assured him that he didn’t have to, but he insisted.

I realize that I haven’t been blogging very much recently. Recently I’ve been slammed with work (both professional and personal), but that doesn’t mean that my life has ceased to be interesting. I’m still having good days and bad days, and more commonly just days with good and bad moments, and though I won’t be here much longer I’ll make renew my effort to write all those moments down, so I don’t forget them when I go.

The Ultra Skull Party

Tuesday, October 30th, 2012

This lovely party was created by a group of 5 boys in 2.9.

“1) What is your party’s name?

Ultra Skull Party

2) What is your party’s symbol?

Skull and Crossed Bones

3) What is your party platform

A. Issue 1: Defense
Stance: Increase the number of hackers and buy more weapons because we are responsible for our people’s safety. Also, we should make more women soldiers.

B. Issue 2: Education
Stance: We think children don’t have to take further education. When children graduate elementary school, they should go military to save our nation.

C. Issue 3: Trade
Stance: We think we can lend our armies to other countries and make money.

D. Issue 4: Civil Rights
Stance: We think people don’t have right to speech because we have tank, gun, etc.

What sort of monster have I helped create?

The Party Bus, Pt 2

Wednesday, October 24th, 2012

The Party Bus

Tuesday, October 16th, 2012

Today I taught 2.9 (all boys, second grade), and at the end of it I told them to have a great field trip. As I had told class 2.5 that I would probably see them on their trip on Friday and they shrieked in despair (thanks guys, thanks for that) I didn’t feel the need to be shot down by more high school boys so I didn’t mention anything about seeing them there. As I packed up to leave, a student shouted out “but wait, teacher! You’re on our bus.”

“Wait. What? Bus?”
“LOOK AT THE PAPER!” The students shrieked as another student rushed forward, jabbing his finger at the bulletin board.
I looked, and yes, sandwiched between a bunch of 2.9 students is my name. They put me, heaven knows why, and my rockstar co-teacher, on the 2.9 bus. I looked at them and smiled and said “yay” and the room suddenly turned into a crazy moshpit of second grade boys screaming at the top of their lungs “EMILY TEACHER IS ON OUR BUSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS.”

Friday should be interesting, to say the least.

What Makes You Happy?

Friday, July 13th, 2012

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All Things That Surround Me

Tuesday, July 10th, 2012

I taught two more boys with balloons classes today. My favorite part of this lesson is pulling balloons out of my bag and telling them that they get to blow them up. Their eyes get so wide… The students (2.8 and 2.9) were surprisingly respectful of the balloons.  I managed to get a really nice picture of both classes, as well as a few individual and group shots.

One of the students I had blogged about previously, the one who was being tested for depression, was one of the volunteers. Earlier I had looked at his paper, and noted that he had ranked his happiness as ten out of ten. This time as he was posing I saw that the things that make him happy, what he had written on his balloon, are “All Things That Surround Me”

Em in Asia! 2012-06-20 00:45:00

Wednesday, June 20th, 2012

Today as I prepared to teach 2.9, one of my loudest, most boisterous, and largest second grade boys’ classes, the students told me that two of their classmates were missing. I asked why, and they all screamed out “psychopathhhh!” I chose to ignore it for obvious reasons.

Right at the end of class, the two missing boys came in, and yelled “HIIII” at the top of their lungs. I asked the louder one why he missed my class.

“Oh. They think I’m psychopath.”
“…What?”
“Yes. They do a brain test to check for de-de-de- maybe suicide?”
“Depression?”
“Yes. The percentage that I maybe do suicide.”
“… I hope that percentage was low?”
“Yes don’t worry teacher, I’m fine! GOODBYEEEEEEE.”

That broke my heart a little.

This morning I…

Tuesday, March 20th, 2012

Rushed to put files on my flashdrive, but due to my computer deciding to run a surprise virus scan without prompting, I had to restart my computer three times because it kept freezing and

After twenty minutes of trying managed to put what I thought was files for the 2nd grade pronunciation lesson on the flashdrive before

Heading to class 2.8 to find out that the computer was MISSING. I

Find this out by having students wait until I lean down to plug in my flashdrive, then look back up in shock as they yell out

SURPRISE COMPUTER IS SICK so I

Taught an emergency lesson of Bowls of Nouns instead before

Rushing back to the office to turn on my computer and write my teacher reflections before my office computer doesn’t work and it’s time to

Go to my 2nd period class (1.1) to teach my 1st grade pronunciation lesson and in the middle of class I

Get a nosebleed and have to run out and hang out in the faculty bathroom for a bit before coming back in and then

After class still don’t have time to reflect because the computer is being crappy and it’s time for

3rd period and 2nd grade boys again and this time the computer is there but

The files that I had put on my flashdrive weren’t, so I taught my lesson

Without powerpoint.

I get a two period break and then I teach one more class of first grade boys. If one more thing goes wrong today, I might just punch my office computer which has finally decided to work.